I needed to forgive people that have hurt me…

Would you want to give a gift to someone who only complained about everything you’ve ever given them?

TY5.pngSomeone who is always begging and never grateful?  Of course not, so why do we expect God to bless us when we are acting like the children in the wilderness?

The children of Israel were rescued from Egypt and on their way to Canaan, but they forgot the art of thankfulness.  They complained the whole time.  Whenever things weren’t going their way, they whined, grumbled, protested, murmured, nagged, nit-picked and found fault in Moses.  The people got on Moses’s nerves so bad that he got angry with God, which caused him to miss out on crossing over to the Promised Land.  If I treat my moments of wilderness like they did, I will extend my visit there and be miserable.  I remember God told me, “Until you find joy in what you are doing at your job and those with whom you are doing it, you will not see an increase”.  I needed to see growth, so I began to pray for grace during this season.  I needed a remedy.

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This envy, resentment, bitterness and hate was killing me, and I mean literally.  One day during a healing service at my church a lady came over and began to pray for God to heal me.  I had been suffering with gall stones for years and never paid attention to it.  It was so bad the doctors said I might need surgery to remove my gall bladder, but I wanted God to miraculously heal me.  I’d seen Him do it before, so why not?  While the lady was praying, she began to tell me that I needed to forgive people that have hurt me, and the reason I had stones in my gall bladder was because I had envy, anger and resentment built up.  I shrugged her off because I didn’t feel that was true.  I was looking for a miracle, not a rebuke.

Not long after this service I was rushed to the emergency room bowed over from excruciating pain.  My stomach was contracting as if I was in labor with child.  I had no clue what was going on; but let me tell you, the pain was so intense, it woke me up out of my sleep and would not stop.  The doctors performed a sonogram and discovered that I had gall stones the size of jumbo olives.  They were too large to pass and my liver was overworked.  The doctors had to do emergency surgery. One of the stones had also traveled to my esophagus, so they had to put a tube down my throat to remove it.  That was causing the most pain.  All of this because I did not take heed to the warnings.  The envy, resentment and anger had turned into stones within my body because my body didn’t know what else to do with it.  God wanted to heal me, but I didn’t want to acknowledge my sin.  You better believe I was asking for forgiveness the night of my surgery.

I was so happy the surgery went well, and I was on the road to recovery.  There was another reason for my happiness.  During my recovery, I was inspired to write my first book, Unleash Your Divine Design.  I had never written a book in my life, nor had I ever thought about becoming an author, but this adversity had within it the seed of a greater benefit and for that I was extremely grateful.

What are you #thankful for?


Published by Mari Benning

I love writing and sharing a day in the life of an ex stay-at-home mom...ME. :) I have found a new passion- BLOGGING and loving it! I should've started a long time ago! Hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoy sharing. Blessings!

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